Hi, my name is Renae.
I am a WORK from home mom of 4. Happily married and expecting child #5, Lily Gayle.
I wanted to share with you a story about not giving up and not letting doubt, fear and worry take over your life.
I am not an expert but, I can tell you my story of the obstacle I am overcoming and how I am working hard everyday to make the best of this life I was given.
My Life December 2014
I was in the middle of finals with my online courses at Ultimate Medical Academy Online. I had a book mess in my living room with notes, books and laptop on my coffee table.
I had to jump up when my alarm clock went off to get my oldest daughter from school. I rushed out the door and picked her up. I got back home and quickly got back to my work.
I wanted to listen to some music so I got up and turned the tv on. Pressed the button on the front of the T.V. and then I turned and bent down to plug in the lights on the Christmas tree to the right of the T.V. Although I didn’t get that far.
I hit my head on the corner of the T.V. Instant pain that sent me to the floor in tears. My daughter ran out of her room to see what the sound was and I explained to her what had happened.
I thought I was too busy with my studying that I must not have been paying attention to what I was doing. I got ice on my head and went back to my school work.
That evening I was nauseated, dizzy, confused slightly and the worst headache ever. My husband took me to the ER. I had a CT scan done to check for head injury.
Not feeling well and waiting for the doctor to come in was the worst. Then the doctor came in the room. She said, “you don’t have a injury. No bleed.”
But, as she handed me a medical report she said, “you need to take this and find a neurosurgeon because you have a brain tumor.” She said she was getting my discharge papers and left the room.
I looked at my husband in disbelief of what I was just told and began sobbing like a baby.
One of those moments in life where everything up until that moment flashes in front of your eyes and you immediately think of
“How will I get through this?”
It was right before Christmas and all the doctor offices in my area had solid booked appointments or were going to be closed for the holiday.
I found a neurosurgeon that saw me on January 6th 2015. He had ordered an MRI. During the visit my MRI results were evaluated and I was told I did not in fact have a brain tumor. I left that office in shock of what was explained to be a glitch on the CT scan.
From January 2015 until July I was fine.
Then on a sunny day we were going to go to the beach as a family for the last retreat of the summer. I felt ill and my head hurt very bad, with numbness and tingling down my arm.
My husband took me to the ER instead of the beach. They did another CT scan and I was told I did in fact have a brain tumor.
I had graduated from Ultimate Medical Academy online with high honors. I decided that I had to put my studies to use and start researching the type of brain tumor and the options for doctors in my area.
The doctor I originally went to in January 2015, he is a spinal & neck neurosurgeon. Up until my research I didn’t even know there was a specific type of neurosurgeon that specialized in different parts of neuroscience.
I found a support group on facebook for my type of brain tumor which is actually called a Colloid Cyst. 3 in 1 million diagnosed each year makes it RARE.
I began my journey to finding a doctor, neurosurgeon with enough experience with my condition that I would feel ok with the advice I would be given. After all it is in my brain!
I went to 4 neurosurgeons for consult. Each one a bit more experienced with this then the other. I had a remote consult with a neurosurgeon in Baltimore, MD. and was told to fly out in person.
My sister and her husband went with me. I flew from California to Maryland to determine how I would be treated. I was told that I may have to have surgery at some point if it grows but, not to worry until then. I could not wrap my mind around that statement.
DON’T worry until then. But, I have a time bomb in my brain!!
I was at home and still a little nervous with the medical advice. During a phone conversation with the neurosurgeon on Christmas eve he told me “live life as normal, don’t worry so much and enjoy your family”
I asked him if he was so certain that I wouldn’t need surgery if a pregnancy would be ok. He said, “yes, if you choose to grow your family, I say do it.”
Up until that point I hadn’t really entertained that idea, it was a question out of fear to make sure the neurosurgeon would back the whole live life normally advice.
January 2016, my husband and I decided that what else brings more hope and joy then to do just that…Let’s have 1 more and revolve our life around our kids and family. Easier said then done at that point.
Months of trying and not conceiving I felt that maybe my time had passed. My OBGYN assured me that medically a pregnancy would be fine and just keep trying. I tracked everything.
Ovulation charts ran my life. It was actually a nice mental break from reading and researching my RARE brain tumor. It gave more hope and more joy to my life to have that hope and desire to have another child.
July 2016 I had a positive home pregnancy test. I was elated and happy to share the news I could have shouted it from the roof tops. Everyone in my family was excited. The older kids talked about being older siblings and the excitement filled the room.
My first OBGYN appointment was August 10, 2016. That morning I woke up not feeling well and I had an odd feeling on the way to the doctor. I told my husband to be prepared for anything.
My intuition of my body was correct. I was in the early stages of losing that baby. 7 weeks along I had to say goodbye to the hopes and dreams that I so looked forward to.
The pain of that loss along with the doom of my RARE brain tumor and just the overall gloom of the moments that passed as I lost that sweet pregnancy that I named “Emily” it took everything I had to pull myself out of bed and face each day.
I have 4 other kids and being told over and over to be thankful that I at least had kids already did not ease my pain. I even had someone tell me it was better because heaven forbid the hormones make the brain tumor grow. Which from research I knew it is not a hormone fed tumor. I decided to find my focus.
I was a stay at home mom of 4. With my schedule for all for kids being crazy busy I can not financially work out of my home at a regular 9-5 job. I also want to be here for my family whenever and however I am needed.
I often lay awake at night searching google for answers while I could not sleep. It just so happened that my youngest daughter was complaining about her jeans and she wanted more leggings so I was googling leggings. Of course my phone sends those wonderful suggestions every once in a while based on my google search. There in the night as I googled I saw Du North Designs Ltd pop up. I had never heard of it before. It lead me to looking at the website and the business opportunity and the mission behind what this company did.
I fell in love!
I researched it and asked questions. Then I decided that I was going to do something positive and uplifting for others as I pull myself out of the blur of gloom I was stuck in.
I joined Du North Designs Ltd on September 13, 2016. I have been working hard at building my dream for my home based business while staying home with my family. Giving me this purpose to help empower other women with support, knowledge and friendship. I want to enrich the lives of others and bring joy to them.
- One gift at a time.
- One happy customer at a time.
- One answer to help a fellow Distributor at a time.
I want to reach out and offer help as a leader. I want to be successful in what I do and be a good example to my family that with hard work and dedication you will accomplish everything you set your mind to with or without a brain tumor or health issue or obstacle that stands in the way.
My Life Now
I became more then just a Distributor with Du North Designs. I feel like I have built my family with the friendships that have been created. I stopped focusing on trying to get pregnant and focused on other things that made me happy.
Then on November 27, 2016 I took a pregnancy test and it was positive. I am now 14 weeks pregnant, overcoming my fear of failure, fear of success, fear of death and to live in a way that I am truly living.
I try to not let these things overcome me and work hard at moving forward. I hope to help others that are overcoming obstacles by offering a hand to help them rise up.
This journey is not over, sometimes I feel like it’s just beginning. Like a good novel that when you get to page 200 there is such a good twist it keeps you glued to the pages and you don’t want to blink or stop to eat. You just want to see how it ends and where the book takes you. I can tell you this.
The chapter I am in is a great chapter and I hope to share the rest as you follow me on this new blog that Du North Designs is gracious enough to give me a platform to share my story in hopes that it inspires you in some way!